The Silence Speaks Loud and Clear

I hope you who are reading out there get my sometimes wierd sense of humor--especially when it comes to yesterday's blog. I mean no disrespect to those who are experiencing real loss. But the truth is I do feel like I've lost a friend. I'm not emotional about it, it's just...empty. I have the radio on today, for a little company. Yesterday was my first real day at home alone without TV, and it was lonely (and those who know me, know I don't get lonely often). I sat down on the sofa several times yesterday, grabbed the remote, and then, "oh yeah...it's dead." I'm not kidding! It has become a serious habit for me. I'm also used to ending my day with TV. I got home from a church meeting last night, tucked my kids into bed, and then wondered what to do next. I tinkered around a bit, then decided to climb into bed and maybe do some reading! I don't really like to read, so now you know I'm desperate. But I learned a small (maybe potentially big) lesson yesterday...
I needed to find a devotional for our meeting last night, and I spent literally most of the day looking through my Bible & devotional books for one (that's the perfectionist in me--there's gotta be something better). And after a few hours of searching, I found one titled, "How God Gets Our Attention". This especially caught my eye, as a friend had shared his own attention-grabbing experiences with us this past week. He drives a tractor-trailer and was hundreds of miles from home, driving a lonely stretch of highway with no city lights in sight. He had a buddy driving not far behind him, but other than that, alone. Without warning he had pain in his chest, and numbness in his left arm. This feeling did not go away and intensified, and he was really getting concerned. He picked up his cell-phone to call someone--his wife, 911, someone--but he had no cell service. He noticed a road sign that said 60 miles to the nearest town. He had no highway shoulder to pull over onto, and was starting to panic and feeling light-headed. He radio-ed the trucker behind him and told him what was going on, but they both knew there was nothing they could do but keep moving to the nearest hospital. He was completely at the mercy of God, there was nothing else in these moments that was going to fix this. This was definitely God begging his attention, as he tells it. And while he is a born-again Christian and a true servant of God, he knew that God was taking great measures to communicate with him, that something important needed to be addressed and God would not be overlooked. As soon as he was in cell-range of the nearest city, he called 911 and an ambulance came out to meet him. His trucker buddy assured him that his truck and load would be taken care of, and off he went to the emergency room, in a strange city, surrounded by people he didn't know, but that were giving him all their attention and the best of care. Of course there is a lot more to the story, but you know he eventually made it home safe & sound, or else he would not have shared it with us. So, the theme around here in the last few days has been, How God Gets Our Attention.
And then--I'm really switching gears here, so stay with me--on a much smaller scale than life & death, our TV quit working. Is it any coincidence that it quit just in time for the new TV season, which I was really looking forward too? I don't think so. I have realized, only because I was forced to, that the TV is a huge vice for me, and that it keeps me from doing, listening, reading--all kinds of things that God would rather see me do. More specifically, His Voice is often drowned out by all the noise and chaos we surround ourselves with. And so sometimes He chooses to speak to us in a life or death moment, and sometimes in the little disruptions of everyday living. And whether it be through a friend's terrifying experience or my TV dying, right now, I'm listening.
"Be still, and know that I am God; I will be exalted among the nations, I will be exalted in the earth." Psalm 46:10 NIV